Whatever I might be "doing" on the surface--whether it be, for example, sitting, observing others, reading the paper, whatever--I'm being one of two fundamental ways when I'm doing it. Either I'm seeing others straightforwardly as they are--as people like me who have needs and desires as legitimate as my own--or I'm not...one way I experience myself as a person among people. The other way, I experience myself as the person among objects.
The Arbinger Institute. LEADERSHIP AND SELF-DECEPTION: COMING OUT OF THE BOX.